My name is Cody Weber.
I'm an open book and I post a lot.

Projects:
Videotape
Portfolio
Phototypes
Prose

Other Places You Can Find Me:
Flickr
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Photo Books:
RGB - ORANGE

VIDEOTAPE is a twelve-month long video journal experiment by me.

OCTOBER

NOVEMBER

Theme by nostrich.

8th April 2009

Photo with 14 notes

It’s just one of those nights.  Lately, I’ve been struggling with this sudden realization that I’m not really alive.  I suppose I’ve brought this on myself, and I suppose it’s something that happens often to people about to leave an area, but my feet feel like they’re stuck to this suddenly grassy earth and I’m feeling constantly claustrophobic.  My every day interactions with people seem trite, like they’re a complete waste of energy.  I spend the vast majority of my time sitting in this room, looking at photos of my future home.  I spend most of my time talking to a girl that seems to really like me, because I’m tired of all the people here that only pretend to.  When Heather was here, she kept saying that there was something “just off” about this area.  That everybody was just as equally mean as they were nice and that everybody seemed to have their own agenda, but the town was so fucking small, that their agenda included every single human around their age and in a 45 mile radius.Everybody in this town has fucked one another.  Everybody.  I have had sex with enough people here that I am confident that I have, in turn, fucked most of the people I know.  One day, I went to eat with a girl I was dating, and we saw someone that we had BOTH fucked around with.  How often does that shit happen?And that’s just normalcy here.  Nobody bats a single fucking eyelash at it’s absurdity.  That’s just how it is.  People go to school here, they go to work here, they go to all the same shitty bars and then they fuck each other.  I know that it’s like that EVERYWHERE, but I don’t think you’re understanding what I’m saying.  There is a small group of people here, that all just happen to dwell in this ghost town, and they all follow the same route with eachother.But everybody is out for their own here, too, so it gets complicated.  You go into a bar, you see an exgirlfriend or someone you fucked, and suddenly their new boyfriend wants to beat you up.  If you have fucked more than five people here, you CANNOT walk into a bar and not get into a confrontation.  It’s fucking ridiculous.I just want to fucking leave, and now some stupid bitch is fucking everything up.  Some cunt stole Tim’s money, which basically means I get to stay here for a little longer.  Fucking. yay.The constant force continues to pull at me.

It’s just one of those nights.  Lately, I’ve been struggling with this sudden realization that I’m not really alive.  I suppose I’ve brought this on myself, and I suppose it’s something that happens often to people about to leave an area, but my feet feel like they’re stuck to this suddenly grassy earth and I’m feeling constantly claustrophobic.  My every day interactions with people seem trite, like they’re a complete waste of energy.  I spend the vast majority of my time sitting in this room, looking at photos of my future home.  I spend most of my time talking to a girl that seems to really like me, because I’m tired of all the people here that only pretend to. 

When Heather was here, she kept saying that there was something “just off” about this area.  That everybody was just as equally mean as they were nice and that everybody seemed to have their own agenda, but the town was so fucking small, that their agenda included every single human around their age and in a 45 mile radius.

Everybody in this town has fucked one another.  Everybody.  I have had sex with enough people here that I am confident that I have, in turn, fucked most of the people I know.  One day, I went to eat with a girl I was dating, and we saw someone that we had BOTH fucked around with.  How often does that shit happen?

And that’s just normalcy here.  Nobody bats a single fucking eyelash at it’s absurdity.  That’s just how it is.  People go to school here, they go to work here, they go to all the same shitty bars and then they fuck each other.  I know that it’s like that EVERYWHERE, but I don’t think you’re understanding what I’m saying.  There is a small group of people here, that all just happen to dwell in this ghost town, and they all follow the same route with eachother.
But everybody is out for their own here, too, so it gets complicated.  You go into a bar, you see an exgirlfriend or someone you fucked, and suddenly their new boyfriend wants to beat you up.  If you have fucked more than five people here, you CANNOT walk into a bar and not get into a confrontation.  It’s fucking ridiculous.

I just want to fucking leave, and now some stupid bitch is fucking everything up.  Some cunt stole Tim’s money, which basically means I get to stay here for a little longer.  Fucking. yay.

The constant force continues to pull at me.

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